Are you married? Do you remember planning for your wedding?
It seems as though it was only yesterday that my hubby proposed to me and I was able to start planning for our special day. I was so excited to plan our wedding.
I called the church to make sure our date was available, and to see what we need to do to be able to be married in the church. I ended up having many conversations with the church secretary about our wedding.
I contacted the hall for the reception, I called for prices on food. Planned the menu. Ordered the cake. Got a DJ and planned the music. Picked out our colors and picked out the dress. Ordered the tuxes and went over books and books of flowers.
We meet with the priest (we were married in the Catholic Church), we went on a marriage retreat (required for the church). Pick out the music for the ceremony.
Through all of these plans I was making, there were a few things that I never really planned or researched. The Vows! I never really paid much attention to our vows. There was 1 word that I knew I didn’t want in our vows…OBEY!! At 19, I was not going to say I will obey my husband. So we decided to omit that from our vows. So this is what our vows looked like:
I, (name), take you (name), to be my (wife/husband), to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish; from this day forward until death do us part.
When we stand in front of our family and friends and recite these vows, we are expressing our love for each other. We are on cloud 9 and just want to share our love for each other with everyone. We tend not to really dwell on the vows, but we should! It seems as though marriage is no longer sacred. It is easily thrown away.
When we say “I, (name), take you (name), to be my (wife/husband), to have and to hold from this day forward” you are entering into a legal binding contract with your spouse.
For better or for worse; We tend to lean toward the better part, never wanting to imagine that our marriage will have struggles because you know we love each other, we communicate, we never fight!
For richer, for poorer; most couples never even talk about money until the wedding is over and this tends to be one of the top reasons for the arguments in a marriage.
In sickness and in health; when we are young and in love we don’t think about a time when we might become sick. But this is another hot topic most marriages struggle with when there is an illness presented.
To love and to cherish (obey);Loving is easy, you wouldn’t be getting married if you didn’t love each other but obey now that is a tough one. Obey means to follow the commands or guidance of: And we think who wants to obey someone who is to be our equal? We have parents, we don’t need another.
From this day forward until death do us part; so begins the legal binding contract from that day until the day you die. Not till I am mad at you because….., too easily we find excuses for why a marriage doesn’t last.
14 years after saying “I Do” to my groom, I now have a better understanding to our wedding vows and yes I do OBEY my husband. I am thankful that the Lord brought us together. We have had ups and we have had downs, sometimes life has been a bowl of cherries and sometimes it was only the pits. But through all of it the Lord continued to work in each of us so that we would be ready to accept His guidance and wisdom so that our marriage will grow to glorify Him!! I married my best friend, the love of my life and together with Christ I am thankful that I am able to continue and actively fulfill my part of our vows.
We need to actively teach our children the importance of wedding vows. We need to SHOW them that marriage does work and that it is a JOY even when circumstance are bleak. We need to PROTECT this sacred union between a man and women.
How do you show your kids the benefits of marriage? Do you go on dates? Do you express your love for each other in front of them?
Wishing you many Blessings
p.s. Happy Anniversary to my wonderful husband!!!